What Should your Foster Child call you?
This is a common issue among foster parents knowing what is appropriate for your foster child to call you. This is just my personal opinion everyone is entitled to their own and its completely fine if you disagree.
I believe that the word “Mommy and Daddy” has a different meaning for children who have experienced neglect and is not accustom to love and proper care. For these children its not about who birthed them or who signed the birth certificate as children are well aware of who that person is unless they are not old enough to decipher that type of information. It has been shown that infants know who there mothers are even without their mothers being physically present. It is that 9 months of bonding that an infant does not forget and even when they are not with there mothers they miss her when she is not present. Infants can learn to fill the mother role with a face that is meeting their daily basic needs and as they grow they will associate Mom to the face that has feed them held them and kept them fresh and clean. Older children are the same way they know who their biological mothers are but it is the Foster parent who is fufilling the day to day care of the child. Every time a Foster Parent is “AVAILABLE” when the child is in need of love attention care. The child builds a bond and the relationship becomes stronger and that much more like a parent child relationship. The child has a sense of belonging a sense of family and every child wants and needs that.
I think it is very appropriate for foster children to call their foster parents MOM and DAD if they feel comfortable. Every child is different and should never be forced to do so if they chose not to. I always let my new babies know it is never my intention to take you away from your family but to just make your family bigger.
Other names I have heard children call their foster parents is Aunt, Ms, Ma, and Pa. If other children are calling you mom and dad the foster children may very well follow along. Your job as a foster parent is to make the child feel as much apart of your family as the rest of the children in your home or as if they were your own children. So you as a foster parent need to also be aware of what you are calling them since that is just as important. I personally call them all my children and when people ask “you had another child what happened to the other one”? I simply reply with yes I did she is doing fine thank you for asking and keep moving forward as some people will not understand but its a conversation not meant to have in front of your foster children
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